Stabbing curlbros in the squat rack/10

Anonymous asked: Is that rippetoe in the top-right corner?

10/10 anon. Would laugh again

The ultimate weight loss plan with tumblr user doyouevenlift;

Eat less you fucking fatass.

Anonymous asked: So many fat apologists in the comments defending this shit, my jimmies are rustled beyond comparison

If I had the link I’d also post the thing about how they’re considering calling some a “fatass” a hate crime in the UK now. So fucking mad right now

>setting up for shoulder press with gym bro
>hearing what other people in the gym are talking about
>hear “I don’t want to get big, I just want to get toned for summer”
>almost drop a plate on my foot hearing this
>gymbro and I both lose our shit so hard that we have to go outside to compose ourselves before continuing our workouts 

You think that’s unbelievable? Let’s break out of greentext for a second.

Gather around children, prepare to cry,
For I’m about to tell you of Miranda Bly.
Met her in a game of Team Fortress 2,
If only back then I had known what I do.

The only ones left in the server were we,
So we had a long talk and it felt right to me.
We were only miles apart, we planned to meet,
But suddenly Miri had grown cold feet.

Turns out she was fat, quite a large girl indeed,
Remember What’s Opera Doc? She looked like the steed.
I’m not a shallow man, and this girl was quite cool,
I gave her a chance, oh how I’m the fool.

She lived with an ex, but made sure that I knew,
They never had sex, I believed it was true.
She said I’d need patience, to dive her deep cunt,
I said a year was fine, she had meant just a month.

That should have been my first sign, and let me take a moment to end the rhyme. She told me she couldn’t imagine going longer without sex. I didn’t put two and two together, I was really stupid. Eventually she called and told me she’d cheated on me with her ex, but that it meant nothing, and if I don’t take her back I’m not a real man.

I told her I’m not a real man and hung up.

Then she kept sending me pictures of her and him having sex, and telling me how good his dick is and how happy he makes her. A few times she’d tell me she was glad she never had to fuck me because she would have faked it.

So one day he kicks her out.

She calls me crying, crying so hard I thought the McRib was cancelled for good. She’s telling me she always loved me, she needs a place to stay, she never meant those things in the texts, he was the one texting me, to split us up and all that.

I laughed, hard, hung up, and went on with my life.

>tfw I’d actually be well over 70kg right now if I didn’t become depressedfag and lose all my gains in 3 weeks
>tfw my strength:weight ratio is much better now
>tfw lower body fat
>tfw legs are smaller now
>tfw larger chest
>tfw deadlift is lower than squat
>tfw I don’t know if all this is good or bad
>tfw all of these feels